


Familiar song

by Mr_Motley



Category: DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV), The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: M/M, Post Oculus, but anyways who remembers what and how well?, havent seen the show past that, so the rest I just made up
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-20
Updated: 2021-02-20
Packaged: 2021-03-06 15:14:54
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 16,275
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26021014
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mr_Motley/pseuds/Mr_Motley
Summary: Barry returns from flashpoint and things have changed, just like Eobard had said. But with no way to change the timeline safely, Barry just has to learn to adjust. No one knows about the flash, or meta humans in general. Barry isn't even CSI in this timeline. He's a music technician? Which is how he meets the lead singer of his favorite band; Winter Storm
Relationships: Barry Allen/Leonard Snart, Hartley Rathaway/Axel Walker, Ray Palmer/Mick Rory
Comments: 10
Kudos: 47





	1. Intro

**Author's Note:**

> Huh. Wasn't expecting to write this, but the idea kept gnawing at me. Completed unbetaed and in edited, so I'm sure it has plenty of spelling errors and shit. Just a heads up

"Things are back to how they should be. Well, for me, anyways."  
Eobard has told him this, and left Barry to stumble home, fear and anticipation leading him. What did he do? How much had changed? He made it to the front step, adjusting his collared shirt as he went to knock. His worry melted as iris opened the door.

"Barry, what happened? Are you ok?" 

"I'm-I'm fine, I just-I just went for a run." Barry replies, off kilter. Iris softened, opening the door for him to make his way inside. The room was the same, iris was the same.

"Where are Joe and Wally?" Barry asked, already back to worrying.

"Dad got called in, and you just missed Wally, he went upstairs maybe twenty minutes ago? I was just finishing my dishes before heading home, but we could order a pizza or something if you want? Eddie will probably be working with Dad on this case pretty late, anyways." She said it so casually. Eddie was alive.

"Wow, Eddie, that's-that's great." He has been waiting to find everything fallen apart, but the only change so far, was an old friend back to life.  
"No, no that's fine, I actually need to check back in at star labs." Barry deflected. He couldn't just sit around, he had to know.

"This late?" Iris frowned.  
"Is everything ok? You're not having any more... residual effects?" She asked carefully.

"Effects?" Barry asked.

"From the lightning. It just seems like you spend a lot of time with your doctors, more and more all the time. I just worry about you." She placed a comforting hand over his, but Barry was anything but comforted. Did she not know?

"I-they're my friends." Barry replies, as safely as he could. She smiled and nodded.

"Well at least let me drive you there. You shouldn't have to walk." She definitely didn't know.

"Great." Barry replied, following her out quietly. He got into the passenger side of her car, all nerves and worry.

"Are you sure you're ok? You seem off." 

"Fine, really, just ready to, you know, hang with the friends." He laughed awkwardly.

"Well, when you find time for your Best friend, give me a call." She smiled. The rest of the ride was quiet, but iris had dropped the questions. When she parked outside of the labs, Barry was quick to get out of the car, and wave her off. The second she was out of sight, he called on the speed force and ran into the cortex. Caitlin and Cisco held down the loose papers, barely paying his entrance any mind. So at least they knew.

"Hey, guys." Barry said awkwardly.

"Hey man, how'd the interview go?" Cisco asked casually, pulling another twizzler out to gnaw on. Interview. What interview?

"Good." Barry replies, instead of voicing his questions.

"We should celebrate." Caitlin smiles as she brings in a small beaker of blue liquid.  
"My latest attempt?" She offers it to Barry.

"I-uhm, maybe not tonight." Barry declines, feeling a twinge if guilt.

"Boo." Cisco replies, tossing a crumpled paper his way.  
"Come on man, it's not everyday you get an opportunity like this! And if you happen to be able to get me and Caitlin tickets, you know, I wouldn't complain." Cisco shrugs. Tickets?

"Don't listen to him Barry. I know you're nervous, but if you get this chance I know you'll do great." 

"Yeah, loosen up man! So come on, drinks?" Cisco coaxed.

"No, I shouldn't, I Uh, incase they call." Barry lied. He didn't know who would be calling, but that wasn't important right now.

"Fine. Spoil sport. You want to run a patrol? I can fire this bad boy up, save a few old ladies, thwart some bank robbers before we call it a night?" Cisco offers, gesturing to the main computer with his half eaten twizzler. Barry nodded with a smile. That actually sounded really nice.

As Barry ran through the city, he noticed small changes. A bakery that was now a flower shop, apartment buildings that had come up last year, now unfinished and behind schedule. He thought about the changes, about the things he would have to adjust to, since changing them back seemed so unlikely.  
After stopping three mugging and a car wreck, he finally decided his best source of information would be his phone, and the internet. With that in mind, he said his goodnights to Caitlin and Cisco over the coms, before heading towards his apartment. Only, did he have an apartment in this timeline? He stopped outside the building awkwardly before spotting his window on the second floor. Yeah, that was his. He could see the small cactus with sunglasses that Cisco had bought him as a housewarming present. He sighed in relief before phasing his way inside. The apartment lay out was much the same, and most of the pictures were similar. They still had small changes, where they were posed differently, or wearing something different than in the pictures from his timeline. But there was someone new in a few of them. James, his mind supplied helpfully. Whoever James was, he was in pictures dating all the way to high school.  
Barry flopped on the couch, and began searching through his phone. Weird. A lot of his contacts were missing. The only contacts he had from the police station were Joe and Eddie. Barry pulled up his own Facebook page, and stopped, startled. He wasn't CSI. According to this, he was a music technician. Wait, like a roadie? That was still a thing? He continued scrolling through, finding pictures of him and James connecting stage speakers and tuning amplifiers. Apparently they've done quite a few small shows since high school. Barry clicked into James' Facebook page, finding a bombardment of exited posts about their interview to set up for a band called winter storm. Barry flipped over to his music, surprised to find it filled mostly by songs from this band. So, the interview was really a big deal. But Barry has no idea how to do any of this. Maybe as time went on, he'd remember more, but would he forget everything from his timeline, just like he did in flashpoint? Barry sighed, closing his phone, and his eyes. It was a lot. But he was in his own home, and he could finally rest.

Barry dreamt of melodies and mosh pits; of reckless weekend drives to concerts ten hours away. He dreamt of being that sad, angry kid, of Iris giving him a burnt CD when winter storm was just starting out. He dreamt of finally going with Iris to one of the last concerts winter storm ever played in central, of meeting James there. He dreamt these memories and soaked them in, and by the time he woke up-half falling off his couch-he was beginning to understand this life a little bit better. 

After waking up and getting ready, Barry was at a loss again. What was he suppose to do? In his timeline, he'd be late for work at the CCPD right now; but here... Barry's phone rang, startling him out of his trance. 

"Barry we got the gig." James tells him, before Barry even says hello. 

"That's-that's awesome. So cool." Barry cringed at himself, and his lack of convincing delivery.

"Damn straight it is! I'm going to send you the files they sent over, alright? Man, I can't believe this!" James kept talking, but Barry just felt a sinking in his chest. How was he going to pull this off? He had no idea what he was suppose to do.  
"And there's something else man." James says seriously.

"What's that?" 

"The shows not going to be in Star city anymore. They're moving it to central." James' excitement seeps through his voice, but he waits for Barry's response.

"Wait, but, Winter Storm hasn't played in Central for the last five years." Barry found himself responding, but he wasn't sure where the words came from.

"Exciting times, man. I'll pick you up Thursday around three. Should give us plenty of time to grab something to eat first, what with your freaky appetite lately."

"Sure, I'll see you then." Barry hung up the phone, feeling somewhat unsettled. Sure, there was a lot he would just have to get use to. And clearly some part of him knew all about this timeline. He just hoped it was enough of him to do his job well.


	2. Chapter 2

Barry stares at the search bar for a minute, before finally typing it in. Nothing on the flash. No flash day, no sightings, nothing. Some pictures on a red blur, and one very vocal anonymous blog about this blur. Nothing more. Barry groaned. This kind of research was really not his forte. This is more Felicity's territory. As soon as the thought hit him, Barry tossed on his flash suit and started running to Star City. But would Felicity even be there? Would their headquarters still be where Barry remembered? Is the Arrow even a vigilante here? Barry burst into the Arrow team's headquarters, heaving a big sigh as he saw Felicity sitting at the computer. She whiled around startled, and Barry almost started laughing from the relief.

"You're still here! Man Felicity, I have so much I want to tell you!" Barry began pacing the floor, pulling his hood down as he talked.  
"I really messed up. I mean, things seem ok, but everything's so different! I'm not a CSI, no one knows who I am, and I don't even know how to start to make sense of it all!" Barry huffed out. He glanced at Felicity, who was just staring back, a little confused.  
"Sorry, this is going to sound strange." Barry started, gauging her reaction.  
"So I went back in time to save my mom, and ended up creating this whole other timeline where she was alive, and I had this happy normal childhood, but I was losing my powers, and so many people were dead, I watched Wally die, and I was running out of time to decide, so I ran back again, and tried to stop myself from saving my mom, so I could come home to my own timeline, but when I got here-"

"Woah woah woah ok, hang on." Felicity interrupted, finally catching up. Barry looked up at her, as she thought it through.  
"How did you get in here?" She finally settles on.

"I-what? I ran." Barry half asked.

"You ran, ok. And you know me?"

"I-of course I do. We met before I was even the flash. But, oh." They met when Barry was a CSI, chasing the impossible. But in this timeline Barry Allen didn't chase the impossible. He wasn't CSI. He slumped into one of the other computer chairs.  
"Oh my god, you have no idea who I am. I am so sorry." Barry almost blushed. He just burst into their secret hide out...

"It's ok!" Felicity replies immediately.  
"This is... weird. But I can handle weird." She gave a small smile, but was clearly still weary.  
"Why don't we start over. I'm Felicity." She held her hand out and Barry shakes it weakly.

"Barry Allen; and well, the flash." Barry replied, gesturing to the outfit. This was going to be a long day. 

"Ok Barry, why don't you start at the beginning." And he did. He told her who he was, and how they met, about the explosion at star labs, and his coma. He told her everything up until he went back in time, right up until he called on the speed force to dodge an arrow flying by him.

"Oliver! It's ok! I'm a friend!" He tried to reason.

"Really, it's ok, we're just talking!" Felicity defended. The Arrow stalked towards them, bow drawn and pointed at Barry. 

"Who are you?" Oliver asked in his scary Arrow voice.

"I, oh man, I literally just went over this." Barry sighed.

"Oliver, calm down. I'll explain everything later, just put the bow down." Oliver relaxed his aim, but kept his bow drawn. Felicity sighed.  
"Ok. Now, Barry, can we help you?" She asked, still in mediation mode. Barry huffed.

"I don't know. I just can't figure it all out, everything's so different." Barry almost shrunk in on himself, running his hands over his face.

"Ok, well maybe we should work backwards. We never met because you have a different job, right? Well let's think the same way about the flash. How did the world first hear about the flash and meta humans?" She asks. 

"The Rogues." Barry mumbles back, thinking it through.  
"May I?" Barry asked, gesturing to the computer.

"No." Oliver says, at the same time as Felicity gestures to it welcomingly. 

"Ollie." Felicity sighs. Barry hesitates, looking between the two before Oliver sighs in defeat, and steps back, allowing Felicity to take point.

"Ok," Barry wheels his chair next to Felicity, typing across the familiar set up.  
Leonard Snart. Nothing. Not even a birth certificate. Barry hesitates. Lisa Snart. Student of Sorbonne University in France? Mick Rory. Serving life sentence in Iron Heights for multiple homocides and arsons, 15 years ago. The same year Barry's mother was murdered. The same year Barry disrupted the timeline.  
"So Mick Rory goes to prison, Lisa goes to college, and the Rogues aren't here to reveal meta humans to the world." Barry summarizes, clicking through the searches.  
"But even if Captain Cold isn't Captain Cold here, he should still have some kind of record."

"I can keep digging, if you want." Felicity offers. 

"I'd appreciate it. I'm working this weekend, but we should catch up sometime." He smiles are her. 

"I'll give you a call. It was nice meeting you Barry Allen." She smiles, and Barry takes that as his que to speed off. He's sure Oliver's already starting up with the whole "not trusting him" speech, but at least he has someone to talk to.  
Barry speeds into star labs, and feels time slow with a painful, sinking fear at the sight before him.  
Caitlin was showing off a sort of presentation of all the flash's test results. His speed, his blood tests, healing factors, and calorie intakes. 

"Oh, Barry. You're just in time!" Caitlin smiled.

"Care to go for a test run?" Dr Wells asks, turning his wheel chair to face him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anyone know how to spell que? Is that right? It doesn't look right.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cue! God thank you, that was figuratively driving me crazy. I knew there would be plenty of spelling grammar issues, but that literally stopped me in my tracks writing. Cue.

"Dr Wells." Barry heard himself say.   
"I didn't think you'd be in today." Barry didn't think it sounded believable, but he was proud of himself either way.

"Of course. We were just going over your monthly results." Wells watched Barry carefully.  
"So, shall we go to the treadmill?" He asks, still viperous as always.

"Now?-Now's, not a great time. I just stopped by to tell Caitlin that I got the job." Barry doesn't actually know how he's stringing these words together, but every part of him is screaming to run.

"Oh Barry that's great!" Caitlin, oblivious to the tension, crosses the room to give Barry a hug. Barry can hardly notice as he and Wells are still eye to eye. 

"I should go." Barry says, before carefully detangling from Caitlin and speeding out the room.  
What was Wells-Eobard-doing here? It didn't make sense. The Rogues didn't have anything to do with catching Eobard. Why was he there? Does he know? Is this the same Eobard that he saw last time? Barry just managed to phase into his apartment before nearly hyperventilating. This didn't make any sense. Barry almost jumped out his skin when his phone started ringing. James. Great. 

"Hey James, it's not a great time," Barry said, sighing into the phone.

"Come on man, it's never a good time. Did you look through the files I sent over?" 

"Yes?" Barry cringed  
"Sorry, no, it's been a really weird day."

"Come on man, this our dream, right? You can slack off next time we set up for Death Wizard or something, but this is Winter Storm. Get it together, we got this!" 

"You're right, sorry, I'll start going through it now." Barry promised.

"Damn straight. I'll see you Thursday, right?"

"Yeah, see you then, thanks." After hanging up, Barry pulled up the email on his laptop. Wow. That's a lot of diagrams. The longer Barry studied them, the more he relaxed into the distraction. 

Barry woke up the next morning, on his couch again, laptop still open on the table. He groaned, sitting up to rub his eyes. Well he studied the material enough to feel a bit more confident for tomorrow, but that was hardly the biggest issue for him right now. Maybe he could get by with avoiding the place-and Dr Wells-until Monday. He contemplated calling Felicity, but thought better of it. He had already imposed so much, and she was helping enough by looking into the rogues. After getting ready, he finally decided to go for coffee before worrying about it any more.

Jitters was pretty packed for a late Wednesday morning, but Barry found the humming of the crowd reassuring. He waited through the line, ordered his usual caramel macchiato, and sat at one of the few open tables. It wasn't long before two cups were placed on the table and Iris slid in the seat across from him. 

"Well this is a surprise." She smiled at him. Barry glanced over her apron, and the manager pin on it. Oh.

"Yeah, I was just. In the area." Barry replied. He should probably worry that these lies came so easily, but honestly he was just thankful.

"Well I'm glad you stopped by, even if I am a little mad at you." She shrugged.

"Wait, mad at me?" Barry asked, brow furrowed. 

"I had to find out that you got the job from James?" She shook her head.  
"I know you're probably over worked and stressed, but you should have called." 

"Right, sorry, it's just been a lot to take in." Barry half laughed, at the truth of it.

"I'm really happy for you, and just so you know I'm going to be in the audience, so if Winter Storm starts having technical difficulties, I'll know who to blame." She teases. 

"Thanks, Iris, that actually means a lot." Barry smiled. Maybe she didn't know his secret in this timeline, and maybe he didn't know enough about it, but he knew Iris would be there for him. She really was his best friend.  
"But enough about me, what's going on in your world?" Barry asked, hoping to lean into the familiarity of their conversations. Iris makes a dramatic humming noise from behind her coffee.

"Not as much as you'd think. On the bright side, my blog is getting a lot of new content, even if no one sees it." She sighs. 

"Your blog." Barry repeats.  
"The one about the blur."

"God, you don't have to say it like that. I know it's real, and if you or Eddie bothered to read my blog, you'd believe it too." Iris huffed, but she wasn't mad. This Iris was use to no one reading her work. Barry felt the guilt piling up. 

"I-I'll read it." He promises. Really, he's somehow managed to keep this secret from iris for years, it was the least he could do.

"It's fine, Barry, I'm just teasing. Besides, you have plenty on your plate right now." She shrugs. 

"Yeah, but still. I'll find the time." Barry places his hand over hers comfortingly, and she smiles.

"Well thank you." She smiles, squeezing his hand a little.  
"I should get back to work, though."

"Alright, thanks Iris." Barry finished his coffee, feeling a bit more at ease. This timeline was very different, but he'd be able to adjust; just as soon as he got rid of Eobard.  
Barry spent the rest of the day walking around town, soaking up the differences, and avoiding star labs. Everything seemed more or less the same. The areas west of third street seemed a bit worse off, but Barry wasn't sure if he was remembering the area correctly to begin with. It was definitely one of his less traveled neighborhoods. He looped back around towards his apartment building, speeding off once the streets were deserted enough. He kicked off his shoes, and grabbed one of his energy bars from the cabinet by the door. Huh. He stopped mid bite to admire the new furniture. He hadn't noticed it there before, but he was finding himself wishing he had thought of it sooner. He was always so hungry, and those last moments between the door and the kitchen were the worst. He shrugged, and started getting ready for bed. It was still pretty early, but he figured he deserved it, and had a pretty big day to figure out tomorrow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok. We're getting closer.


	4. Chapter 4

There was a banging on the door.

"Barry Allen, wake the fuck up! I will break this door down!" Barry snorted himself awake, before stumbling to the door. He opened it and James immediately pushed his way in.  
"Goddammit, Barry, get ready for gods sake." James huffed, already pushing his way into Barry's kitchen.

"What time is it?" Barry almost mumbled out.

"Sh! Stop. Go. I'm making coffee, just hurry." James shooed Barry away, and began angrily clanking around his kitchen. Once Barry was safely behind his door, he sped through getting ready. 2:00. They had plenty of time. Barry rolled his eyes. 

"I thought you said you'd be here at three?" He asked, stepping back out towards the kitchen.

"Did you read through the files?" James asked, unimpressed.

"Yeah, of course." Barry replied. He was actually feeling pretty confident about it all after going through it so much.

"Good, just making sure you're taking this seriously. You've been distant lately, which I get, but suck it up. This means everything to me, and you, and our friendship." James ranted as he poured two cups out.  
"So if you get us fired from this job, I will never forgive you." He shoves one of the cups into Barry's hands.

"Oh, I mean I won't?" Barry cringed.

"Fuck, man, relax, I don't mean Never never, but it will be WAY worse than the time with the friendship bracelet, ok? Now let's go." Barry rolled his eyes, almost as a muscle reaction to James' theatrics, before following him out. The whole drive there James kept quizzing him on ports and cables and all the specifics that Barry had been worried about. Even as they ate their fast food along the way, James kept at it.

"Can we turn on some music?" Barry sighed.

"No. Now for the bass, tell me how the amp set up goes again. -in detail!" James waves a fry at Barry. Somehow Barry managed to answer every question to James' relief. James parked the car, and Barry let out a breath.

"Thank god."

"You can thank me later, let's go." When they walked through the doors, they were greeted by a short man in a suit. He walked faster than seemed right for his stature, and looked over the two of them with an air of authority and scrutiny that kept Barry feeling on edge. He would not mess this up. 

"Boys, my name is Jeffery Winston, I am the band manager, you will call me sir, or Mr Winston. The band will be passing though the auditorium while you are setting up. Do not speak to them, do not distract them, in fact, don't even look at them. You have your back stage passes for the concert you can gape then. Until that point you'll do your jobs, understood?" Me Winston glared up at them.

"Yes" James replies nervously 

"Yes sir." Barry tried offering an awkward smile, but the two were waved off towards the stage.

"Man, so he's intense." Barry huffed at James as the two were left to set up the gear.

"Shorter than I figured from his Wikipedia." James replied with a shrug.  
The two sorted through the gear, working for the next few hours in relative silence. So when the doors flew open, and several security guards lead the way in, the noise alone was enough to draw Barry's attention. But behind them... Barry's jaw actually dropped. Was that... Barry locked eyes with Leonard Snart, who gave him an appraising once over, before smirking, and giving him an actual wink. What? No. What the hell was he planning? Barry kept watching as the security team lead Snart and his band across the room and into the back.

"So much for not even looking at them." James snickered.

"I-I, uhm." Barry stammered. That was Leonard Snart. Career Criminal, super villain, Leader of the Rogues, Legend, and... and he wasn't going to remember any of that. Here he was just... a singer? Oh my god. Snart was the lead singer! Barry struggles to pull up the memories from this timeline, trying to make sense of it, but nothing solid was coming through. 

"Dude, do not go back there." James scolded. Barry hadn't even realized that he had gotten to his feet.

"No, I know, I won't." Barry replied with a frown. He stared at back where the band had disappeared for a moment longer, before kneeling back down to the set. He worked beside James in complete silence, working on autopilot and obsessing over his thoughts. Heatwave goes to prison, Captain Cold becomes a rockstar, he sends Golden Glider to college, no one finds out about the metas. Barry's hands were starting to shake. He had to go talk to him. But what would he even say? Cold wouldn't remember him. To him, Barry was just some geeky roadie, setting up the stage for him. Someone he'd normally never talk to.

"Dude can you relax?" James almost whispers over to him.  
"You can fanboy out later, we're almost done here. Shit, if we're lucky, their guys will let us stay for rehearsal." Barry nodded back, but didn't reply. It was just all so weird. But when their work was done, and they were standing back admiring the stage, Mr. Winston approaches them.

"You two." He pointed at them with a frown.

"Yes? Sir?" James asked, aiming for respect, but probably coming across just the opposite. Mr. Winston's frowned deepened into his brow.

"If you're staying for rehearsal you will sit in the audience. Your back stage passes don't go into effect until the doors open to the public, understood?" Me Winston said it as though it physically pained him. 

"Yes sir, thank you." Barry grinned. Mr. Winston shot him a cautious glare, before nodding and taking his place at the other side of the stage. James basically pulled Barry to their seats.

"Any minute now. This is so much better than any other show we've been to. It's like a private concert!" James' excitement bubbles up, but the anticipation Barry felt made it hard to listen to anything else.  
When Winter Storm-Winter. Storm. Oh my god it was so obvious-finally took the stage, Barry's heart was pounding. He didn't know what to expect, but he was so on edge, some part of him knowing something would happen. The band, minus Snart, came onto the stage casually, and began tuning their instruments, playing light tunes to themselves. Finally, Snart came onto the stage, adjusting the mic to his height, before tapping it lightly. Then, impossibly, he looked right at Barry.

"If it's alright with all of you," Snart began, his soothing drawl carrying through the sound system and over the auditorium.  
"I'd like to start this little rehearsal with a classic."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, before we get to the music, I'm just going to say it: as far as I know right now, these are real songs that I'm claiming were written by Leonard Snart, ok? Some of these were written by women and refer to themselves as queen. So Snart will absolutely be calling himself a queen at some point in this fic. Anyways, I'll put all the song names in the authors notes. Second thing, I must once again apologize for not knowing anything about music or concerts. We're just going for it.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song is Pisces by Jinjer

The slow melody started up from the guitarist, and Barry was on the edge of his seat. He felt the music pushing through him in waves; he remembered this. This song, while not nearly his favorite, had been one of the first songs to draw him so strongly to this band.  
"Step forward" Snart began singing softly, beautifully.  
"and meet a new sunrise,  
A coward is shivering inside  
Today I'll, I'll be a friend of mine  
who swallows, Suffering with smile  
I drew a different reality  
With unconditional loyalty  
Ego hardly can be piqued 'cause I'm selfless" as the beautiful opening broke down, the metal music picked back up, leading Snart to growl into the mic.  
"Scale armour belies  
Virgin innocence  
One being brings life  
Another runs for death" Barry was hardly there anymore; he was back in time, hearing this song for the first time on his burnt cd, clutching his Walkman to his chest late at night. He was watching himself put Winter Storm posters up in his room growing up, planning concert visits and crying over new albums. There on the stage, Snart smiled sadly as his metal screams faded back into melodies.  
"No promises I ever give  
Don't rely on me and I won't deceive  
The beginning or the end you can't tell  
When I wave my fin and shake my tail  
I grew in different normality  
With unblamable morality  
Hooks and nets are there for me but I'm skittish..." Barry didn't remember everything, not completely, but it was like some part of him underneath was dying to get out, to experience this moment that Barry had, in this timeline, worked so hard to reach. All he could do was watch the stage with awe, half seeing Leonard Snart singing; and half seeing Len Winters in person.  
"I'd say that's as good of a test as any." Len shrugs, after they finish the song. As the band begins to talk amongst themselves, Barry still feels frozen in it all. 

"Dude." James nudges his arm lightly.

"Yeah." Barry breathes out. The two sat there for a while longer, until the band finished talking, and left the stage completely. The silence rang around them, and finally James sighed.

"Alright man, let's get something to eat before the show really starts." James stood, patting Barry's shoulder before walking off. Still a little dazed, it took Barry a second to follow. They drove to a big belly burger down the street, and Barry was vaguely aware of ordering himself a couple burgers, and sitting across from James in a booth.  
"So?" James asks, before eating a few fries at once.

"I-what?" Barry asked, trying to shake himself back into the moment.

"Come on, man, that was amazing for me, but for you? I mean you've been obsessed with the guy since puberty." He teases.

"I have not been obsessed." Barry defended with a blush, but he was suddenly remembering the poster above his bed in detail. Oh my god. His room at Joes house was Filled with pictures of Leonard Snart. What the hell was this timeline?

"Ok, sure. But still, seeing him up there? And don't think I didn't notice him looking right at you." James baits.

"I-I don't," Barry was actually at a loss. It was like some part of this realization had actually broke his brain a little. After a minute James sighs.

"Can I be honest to the point of kind of being a downer?" James asks bluntly. Barry just nods, confused, but gesturing for him to continue.

"Ever since the, you know, C-O-M-A, you've been really different. I know it was stupid of me to think this job would bring everything back to normal, but this, everything today should mean, you know, more to you, than this." James shrugged sadly.

"James, I, first of all, you can say coma, you don't need to spell it," Barry frowned,  
"And second; this does mean everything to me. Being here with you, finally, it's like everything we've worked for since we first met is finally here." Maybe it was the guilt, but somehow it felt like Barry was channeling the real him for this, the him from this timeline. The one that was suppose to be here.  
"I know I'm different than I was before the coma, and honestly I'm different than I was even last week. But you've always been a great friend, and I am so proud that we made it. I know I wouldn't be here without you, and I know it means so much to me. I just hope you can still see how much I appreciate it, even with how different I am." Barry had a lot of guilt about lying to the people he loved, in this, and apparently every timeline. But as both timelines worked together to explain this, no part of it was a lie. Barry couldn't remember everything, but James clearly had been a really good friend. Barry was just sad they had never met in the old timeline.

"Ok. Good." James almost sniffed, clearly trying to shift back into nonchalance.  
"Well we better get back before the place starts opening up."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok I feel like things are going to kind of get rushed through this next bit lol, but im excited so it's happening. Once again, the song is Pisces by Jinjer


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I should probably apologize

"Barry!" Iris yelled, pushing through the crowd outside to reach Barry and James.

"Iris! You made it!" Barry smiles, accepting her hug.

"Duh, you didn't think I'd miss this! I can't believe they came back to central. After the last time, I really didn't think I'd ever see it."

"I know, it's weird, right? Especially with the awards happening in Starling anyways, why split it up? But whatever, I'm just trying not to look a gift horse in the mouth. Saved us the drive." James grins back.

"Wait, what?" Barry asked, almost unsure he had misheard them over the crowd. But no, he knew they hadn't played here in years. So why come back now? Snart couldn't actually remember, right? No, no. The Snart from his world was dead. Barry's mother didn't remember dying in a previous timeline, why would anyone else.

"You two better get in there, unless you want to fight through the doors with the rest of us." Iris told them. James and Barry waved her off, and James lead the way to the back entrance. The security nodded as they passed, and Barry felt his nerves reignite instantly. They were going backstage. Barry had dreamed of this moment for so long.

"Boys." Mr Winston forced a smile as he walked over to them. 

"Mr Winston." Barry greeted in return.

"There's the room for you just there." He pointed beyond them.  
"But, ah, Barry, was it?" He asks, and Barry just nods.  
"I'd like a word privately, if you'd follow me." Mr Winston turns, and begins walking away. Barry shrugs at James.

"I guess I'll meet you in there." Barry huffs, before following Mr Winston into a room near the back. Mr Winston was seated as his desk, and gestured for Barry to sit across from him. Somehow, at his desk, Mr Winston seemed bigger, more imposing.

"Before we talk, I'll need you to sign these." Mr Winston explained casually, before laying a couple packets of paper between them. Barry looked between the papers and Mr Winston in confusion.

"What are these?" Barry asks, before picking them up.  
"Non-disclosures? A... sexual consent form?!" Barry was pretty sure he was actually dead, or trapped in some really bizarre dream. At either rate, he could barely feel his face through its blush-risen heat.  
"I-wow-I don't understand."

"Everything there is standard for anyone who sees any of my talent one on one, the details are non of my concern." Mr Winston assures him.

"One on; wait am I actually going to meet Len Winters?!" Barry gapes. Len Snart, his brain corrects. Wait, no, Leonard Snart. Criminal. Right. Barry takes a shakey breath before signing each, and sliding them over. Mr Winston appraises each, before shuffling them and tucking them into one of his desk drawers. 

"What is your sexuality, Mr Allen?" Mr Winston asks, almost bored by Barry's nerves.

"I-uhm." In the old timeline, Barry had never come out as bi. But here, god, everyone in his life knew he was. In fact, most people thought he was lying about being attracted to women too. Everyone already knew.  
"Bi, but I prefer men." Barry said aloud. He had never said that, but of course he'd said it here so much it rolled off the tongue with ease. 

"Mr. Winters has expressed an interest in you." He said calmly.  
"He is a busy man, and none of my talent can afford to have any rumors running around. Speak of it, and we will sue you."

"This is a really weird way to go about this, you do know that?" Barry asked, already standing.

"Mr Allen." Mr Winston said sternly.

"It's fine, I get it, just, trailer that way?" Barry asked, already half out the door. Ok. So maybe Snart did remember, and this was just to get a rise out of the flash. Or, maybe he didn't remember, and Len Winters really was attracted to this Barry, the one who never knew Captain Cold. Barry was almost shaking as he knocked. He wasn't sure which outcome was more nerve racking.   
Len Winters opened the door, smiling slightly.

"Barry, was it?" Len asks, stepping back, and gesturing Barry inside. Barry walked up the steps, heart in his throat.

"Yeah, Barry." He held out his hand, and Len shook it with a smirk.

"You look a little star-struck, are you ok?" There was a teasing glimpse in his eyes, but this Leonard has so much more sorrow on his face.

"I-uhm, yeah, sorry. I'm trying to not freak out. I mean not freak out, I just know you probably deal with a lot of crazy fans, and I'm not, you know, crazy, but I am a fan, and talking to you, you know, face to face is really, ah, sorry." Barry stumbles out. Len smiles a little more, stepping back to the counter.

"I'm going to pour myself a drink, can I get you anything?" He offers.

"Sure, yeah, sounds good." God why was he so nervous? This was Snart for gods sake. Len pours out two drinks, before handing one to Barry.

"Been a fan long?" Len asks.

"Uhm. Kind of? Yes. I mean I never really understood music before you. Your band! I mean. I mean I liked musicals, still do, but." Barry took a shakey breath.  
"The more I think about it, the more I think your music changed my life." Barry finally settled on, taking a sip of whiskey, and daring a glance up at Len. Len watched him in consideration for a minute.

"Any of it for the better?" Len asks, and Barry actually laughs.

"There are so many things I would have never let myself feel without you." Barry explained honestly. His drink was set next to him, Len leaning on the counter opposite him. Len invited Barry here. Barry signed a god damn sexual consent form! Barry let himself look Len over. He honestly looked gorgeous, but then of course he did. Rock Star, Criminal, Super Villian, Legend, Snart was always gorgeous. And here, in this timeline, Barry could finally admit it, finally do something about it. No one would question it, or judge him, everyone... everyone already knew he wanted this. Barry stepped forward, leaning into Len's space. Len tensed, but didn't pull away. Barry wouldn't lose his nerve now. He gently placed his hands over Len's soft thermal shirt, wetting his lips before leaning in. His heart was pounding in his ears, and as Len met his kiss, Barry couldn't even keep thinking about it all. White-hot passion and heat, and god, Barry could get lost in this forever. Finally. Len moves them forward, until Barry's back is against the wall, and Len is grinding into him. Oh fuck, this was really happening. 

"Tired of the small talk already?" Snart nearly growls in his ear. Barry laughs airy and high off it all.

"Mmh, I could listen to you all day, but at some point-ah!" Barry stopped to catch his breath as Len kept kissing and biting and grinding; fuck!  
"At some point I thought I'd lose my nerve," Barry continues, though he's much more interested in whatever Len's doing.

"Well then I suppose I should thank you for speeding things up." Len almost teased; wait, was that a pun? No, stupid, of course not.

"Oh god," Barry moaned. Why hadn't they done this sooner? So many years of tension; wait no, that wasn't here. 

"While I'd love to take this as far as we can, Barry. I'm afraid you'll have to come back after the show for that." Len tells him, slowing down and pulling away just a fraction. Barry tried to get his brain to catch up.

"But you invited me here." Barry almost asks, leaning his head back against the wall to catch his breath.

"Hm? Oh right. I was going to ask you about the amp voltage." Len shrugged. 

"The-wait." Barry pushes Len's shoulders back a bit to look at him.  
"But your manager had me sign a sexual consent form! Like an actual form." Barry was a little dumb struck.

"Jeff?" Len scoffed.  
"Of course he'd jump to that. At any rate, Barry, I'm afraid I'm due on stage soon, and still have some preparing to do." Len looked Barry over carefully.  
"The offer to meet me here after the show still stands." He offers softly.

"I-I'd like that." Barry was half mortified, but managed a small nod.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beggar's dance by Jinjer, the mission (m is for milla mix) by Puscifer

Reality crashed in after Len lead him out, and Barry trudged to the room backstage. He just kissed Len Winters completely unprovoked. Snart! Leonard Snart! Captain Cold! Evil, Criminal, Legend, Hero... no, no, just a rock star. A fucking rock star! And Barry-Nobody-Allen just kissed him. Somewhere in this internal rant, Barry stumbles into the room, leaning against the door behind him.

"Barry? Are you ok?" James asks, standing to reach out a supportive hand.

"I kissed him." Barry says, still absorbing the fact himself.

"Ew, Winston?" James asks.

"Wha-God, no! Len Winters!" Barry defends, trying to keep his voice down. James jaw almost drops.

"You didn't."

"I actually did. He wants me to meet him back at his trailer after the show." Barry's heart was pounding. 

"Holy. Fuck. You're serious?" James is starting to look actually giddy. Barry just kind of looks up at him bewildered.

"I shouldn't." Barry sighs, already feeling the doubt and shame rise up. Snart was a criminal, a murderer, he kidnapped Barry's friends, and he was older, and a man, and... and none of that mattered. Especially not in this timeline. But Barry still felt it.

"I think. I might actually slap you." James replies considerately.

"What?" Barry asked, brow furrowed.

"You're so goddamn stupid. You meet the man you've been obsessing over for as long as I've known you, seduce him, and than what? You're not going to go through with it? I'm sorry, but from where I'm standing, this is the best day of either of our lives, and you need to stop whatever cloud of worry you've been in since the coma, and seize the fuck out of this day." James was actually decent at pep talks. But.. that wasn't really the issue. Everything else aside, This Barry wasn't the one who had worked so hard for this. He just took over this life and ended up using it to work out his own unhealthy feelings for the man. Everything about this situation made him crawl with guilt. Not exactly the best conditions to have a one night stand with anyone, no matter how bad you want them.

"I don't know. Maybe I just need some time to process." Barry sighed. James just rolled his eyes.

"Ok, fine. You process, I'll enjoy the show."

"It's starting?" Barry asked, nearly jumping.

"I meant the show of your pointless internal struggle about sleeping with your celebrity crush." James laughed.  
"But we should probably get out there so we don't miss the opening band." James shrugged.

"I'll pass, just let me process." Barry whined.

"If you let me go out there alone, I'll be forced to find Iris and tell her everything." He shrugs.

"Fine! God, you're evil." Barry huffs out. The two leave the back area, past the security and into the general crowd. Eventually the opening band made it out, but it wasn't really Barry's kind of music. Where Winterstorm encompassed some aspect of so many different genres, this band didn't seem to know what genre it even was. Maybe it was biased, but it just didn't click for him. Instead of paying attention to them, Barry found himself scanning over the crowd to look for Iris. She wouldn't be in the VIP section with them, which made it a lot harder. But by the time the band was on their last song, he managed to make eye contact with Iris from across the auditorium. He waved and she gave him a grin and a thumbs up. When Barry turned back to the stage, Winter Storm was walking out.

"Thank you, Central City!" Len smiles into the microphone.  
"It has been far too long, but I can honestly say, it's good to be back. To those of you who planned to be in Starling for this, well I thank you for baring with us. Now, there's a rumor online about a certain opening song of mine being good luck." Snart looks over the cheering audience, stopping once his eyes land on Barry.  
"I hope you all enjoy, Beggar's dance." Len turns back to his band, making some quick hand motions before the music starts up.  
"We do what we have been training to,  
Hopeless beggar's dance,  
To this beautific flute.  
If there's Lord up there, he's just a guest  
Under this dome of ignorance!  
Our boat is called  
Apocalypse  
Who's in front of us  
We cut them deep  
Yet untold, still unheard  
We cherished lives to the underworld  
King of everything  
King of everything!  
King of everything,  
Who's your king of everything?"  
Len sings, and saunters across the stage. Barry's heart is pounding. Who knew Snart could sing so beautifully? As they finish the song, Snart actually looks happy, for a moment. The crowd is so deafening, and Barry can't take his eyes off the stage; off of Len.  
Len takes a sip from a water bottle before nodding to his band to start the next song. The basest steps up to the second mic, and before they play the first note, Barry knows the song. 

"What do you know?" The basest begins to ask, laying down the background.

"The birds and the bees they are wise to the lies  
So they took to the trees and took to the skies  
On top of the chain and safe from the rain" Len's looking right at Barry again, and he knows all Len could see from him is pure awe.  
"What'cha know about the ways on the underside?"

"What do you know?"

"Bought a hot shot gat from a north end guinea" Len wasn't looking at him anymore, but Barry could see the wheels turning, like the old Snart. 

"Cause they're hip to the bull and hip to the lies;  
Ante up with your ass cause you ain't got a penny,  
What'cha know about the ways of the underside?" Snart paced the stage as he sung, and Barry couldn't help feel this song brought more of his Captain Cold out. He was still the same man, somehow. All Barry could do was watch in awe throughout the rest of the show. When they had played several more songs, and taken their bow, Snart grinned.  
"Thank you, Central City! You always know how to make a man feel right at home." He locked eyes with Barry, tilted his head towards the back in invitation. Barry practically jumped, pushing his way through the crowd. 

"Go get him tiger!" James laughed, but Barry didn't feel he had time to bother replying.  
When he got backstage, he bee-lined for Snart's trailer, breezing past security. But once at the door, he hesitated. Was this really what he wanted? Yes, clearly, but what about the Barry that was suppose to be here? Would he be ok with Barry running in to be with his Villain? With a shakey hand, Barry knocked on the trailer door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm trying not to be too impatient as I write this, but holy shit I want to write the other characters in.... but these things take time. Just gotta keep writing!


	8. Chapter 8

"Barry." Len smiled, as he let Barry in past him.

"Len-can I call you Len? Is that ok?" Barry asked awkwardly. It was better then Mr Winters, or Snart, or Cold...

"Of course, Barry. How did you like the show?" Something about Len's familiar drawl was so powerful in that moment. Maybe it was because Barry was so overwhelmed by it all, maybe it was because Len had died, almost a year ago. Barry let out a half-choked laugh, and tried not to let the tears prick at his eyes.

"It was really great. You have a gorgeous voice." Barry told him, all shy energy bouncing through him.

"Yes well, getting to where I am was more chance than anything, I suppose." Len was watching him carefully.  
"Are you alright, Barry?" He asks softly. Barry blushes.

"I'm fine! It's just, I mean it's a lot to take in, and I'm pretty hungry, actually. And this-" Barry motioned between them,  
"Is kind of a lot."

"You're the one who jumped me, Barry." Len almost laughs.

"I know! And I don't regret it or anything, I just think; I mean I know you probably don't date fans, and probably for good reason, but we don't have to call it a date, or anything, I just; do you want to go out for dinner?" Barry was overly aware that his voice had become something of a squeak by the end, but was trying to play it off. Len smirked at him.

"I'm not the kind of person who can just go out for dinner with an attractive stranger. People will talk."

"Oh. Right. Uhm, we could order in? Or I could pick something up? I just, I mean I eat a lot, and I'm pretty hungry, but I was also kind of hoping we could talk before;" Barry cut himself off. Before he has sex with a rockstar. He could feel himself blushing deeper.

"I'm not expecting anything, Barry. There's no pressure here." Len seemed a little conflicted, and Barry felt a pang of guilt.

"No! I know, you're not like that, I just, I guess I'm in a little over my head." Barry laughed.

"Well that makes two of us, then." Snart smiled softly.  
"How about I order something from the steakhouse down the road. If memory serves, they have an excellent cheesecake." Snart sits on the side of his bed, pulling out his phone to look up the menu. Barry sits next to him, close enough to read over his shoulder. Len assures him to pick whatever he wants, and once they order, Len sets his phone to the side.  
"So, you wanted to talk?" Len asks curiously. Barry's heart was pounding.

"I, yeah. Did you always want to be a singer?" Barry asked. He couldn't help but wonder if his Snart had ever wanted this life. Len considered the question for a minute before sighing.

"I've given out a lot of interviews over the years, but I'd like to be more honest with you, if you can promise it won't leave this room." Len explained softly. 

"Sure, of course, just between us. I mean I did sign a non disclosure," Barry laughs awkwardly.

"Very well. When I was very little, I wanted to play hockey." Len confesses with a smile.

"Wow that is just so typical." Barry laughed. 

"How about you; you always want to be stage crew?"

"I-" Barry started, but felt his heart clench.  
"I actually wanted to be a scientist, or engineer. I thought I'd either become a CSI, or I'd build something to change the world." Barry kind of scuffed his shoe against the floor.

"So what lead you here?" Snart asks, fully curious.

"Well, you did, I guess. I heard your music, and kind of became obsessed with understanding why it was so beautiful. From a technical standpoint, I mean. Obviously your voice is amazing, but the composition of each piece, the timing of the drops and highs, and rare uses or reverbs, it just kind of became a part of me." Barry shrugs with a small smile. 

"So when you said my music changed your life, you really meant it." Len was watching him so carefully, and they were so close sitting next to each other, on Len's bed...  
"Doesn't really seem to be for the better from where I'm standing." He continued. Barry frowned, shifting to face Len a little more.

"I still went to college, got my degree. And my foster father is still trying to get me to join the CSI at CCPD. But-" Barry nervously shifted through the memories slowly surfacing.  
"A few years ago I was kind of in an accident." Barry started.  
"Everyone in my life is always telling me I'm not the same anymore. And I think they're right. I was never really happy, but since my accident, I've been kind of consumed by-" guilt, responsibly, by being the flash.  
"By feeling like I have to keep pretending to be who I was. Or to live up to what other people need from me. Being this, loving your music the way I do." Barry wet his lips nervously.  
"It brings me back to myself, which is something I didn't have before." In the old timeline.  
"Even if no one else sees who I am anymore, I do. So, thank you. Maybe I'm not solving---oh!" Oh my god! Of course Eobard is still here! Barry isn't solving his mother's murder! Joe probably still doesn't believe him! Does Joe even know about the flash? 

"Barry?" Len asks cautiously.

"Sorry! I just! I realized something about a-about something I'm working on, but it's-there isn't much I can do right now, so." Barry sat back down next to Len, not even realizing he had stood up.  
"Sorry. So, hockey, huh?" Barry laughed, embarrassment piling up.

"Mh, luckily a friend talked some sense into me. Turns out I don't quite have the physique for it" he shrugs. 

"Still, ice, winter, seems right up your alley." Barry chuckled. 

"Maybe so. But I think I'm a little too competitive anyways." Len shrugged. Barry feigned a gasp.

"You? Never would have guessed." He laughed. Cold being competitive whether in crime or album sales or hockey would not surprise him.

"Careful, you're almost acting comfortable around me." Snart teased. Barry laughed.

"Who would have thought? I'm actually feeling more myself than I have in a long time." He smiled softly. Maybe he and Cold hadn't ever just sat and talked like this, but there was always something between them. Something Barry had been too scared to explore in the old timeline, something he missed out on entirely, after Len died. 

"This might shock you, Barry, but the feelings mutual." Len smiled.

"Please, you're an actual rock star, I'm just the nobody tech-guy." Barry almost laughed.

"Don't sell yourself so short. It's been a long time since I could just talk with someone without playing a role." The two looked at each other, and Barry couldn't help but glance at Len's lips. It would be easy to lose himself in this, to put aside the flash, and captain cold, and CSI Barry, and music tech Barry, and rockstar Leonard Snart. It would be easy just to be the two of them, to let the rest go. A knock at the door had Barry jumping out his skin. Len chuckled lightly, before getting up to answer the door. He laid the food out on the small table at the other end of the trailer, gesturing Barry over.  
Barry teased Len about his manic eating habits, and Len teased him right back for inhaling his food. When they were done, the two just looked at each other over the table, each trying to figure out where they would go from here. Finally, Len let out a shakey breath.

"There's this gala in Starling this week." Len started.

"Oh, right, some kind of awards?" Barry asked, shuffling his plates and plastic ware into a neater pile.

"I'd like to ask you to be my date."


	9. Chapter 9

"Date? Like a date-date; like dating?" Barry asked, trying to clarify.

"If you like. My manager will insist on taking you to our tailors, and it'll be a two hour drive each way. I'm not generally use to having someone with me, but I'd like to see you again." Len explained calmly.

"Y-yeah, yeah ok." Barry replied breathlessly.

"There will be cameras, and people will talk." Len warns.

"I'm not use to fancy things." Barry warned right back.  
"I don't want to, you know, embarrass you or anything." 

"Don't worry about me, Barry, I know what I want. Do you?" 

Barry left with Len's cell number in his phone, and a promise to see each other before tomorrow's show. His heart was pounding and he was a little dazed. An actual date. 

"Jesus Christ, about time!" James huffed out as Barry stepped outside.

"James! Hi." Barry replied awkwardly.

"Ok, I want to hear every filthy detail." James tells him as he leads the way to his car.

"What-we didn't-you're not even gay!" Barry sputters out. 

"So? I'm being supportive! And what do you mean you didn't? I thought you went to bone him, what the hell have I been waiting out here for then?" 

"We had dinner." Barry blushed.  
"And you didn't have to wait for me."

"I'm your ride, and your friend, of course I did. And dinner with a rockstar, huh? How was that?" James unlocked his car, and they both piled in.

"Really good. He wants me to be his date at this award thing." Barry grins, almost cradling his phone to his chest. James stops dead in his tracks, turning fully towards Barry.

"Barry. That is a huge deal, you better not be fucking with me." He frowns.

"No, I-I mean I know it's a big deal, a fancy gala, and-"

"No, no, I mean Len Winters has NEVER brought a date to an event. What the hell kind of dinner did you two have?" He gaped.

"We just-we really hit it off." Barry explains with a blush. It was a really big deal. The guilt started to creep in again. 

"Goddamn, well when you end up getting married, you better invite me to the wedding." James laughed.

"Please, you'll be the best man for introducing us." Barry laughed softly. It was a joke. Really, maybe it was actually a really big deal, but Barry had tricked his way into this. He knew things about Snart that he shouldn't know. That's why things went so smoothly. It wasn't... god he was horrible. James dropped Barry off at his apartment, and agreed to pick him up at three tomorrow. (Actually three, this time, James.)  
Barry trudged into his apartment, and flopped on the couch. What was he doing? He was suppose to be the flash, a hero! Instead he was using that knowledge to seduce his former villain-turned-rock star. It didn't get more selfish than that. He pulled out his phone, hovering over Len's number for a moment before calling.

"Barry." Len answered. 

"Len. Hi. Sorry to call," Barry started, but Len just laughed.

"If I didn't want you to call, I wouldn't have given you my number." 

"Right. Yeah. Ok, it's just, I've been thinking. You can't really want me, right? This isn't, I mean you're an actual rock star, and I'm a fan, and maybe it's easy to forget all that when it's just us talking, but I mean, I'm just me, and there's a lot you don't know about that." Barry rushes out. Len chuckled again from the other end of the line.

"There's a lot you don't know about me too, Barry. Isn't that the whole point of spending time together?"

"Right. No, it is. I just, it's still kind of sinking in. I guess I'm just worried." Barry explained.

"Well if it makes you feel any better, I'm pretty sure I'm the one who should be worried." Len sighed heavily.

"You are?" Barry asks softly, shifting to curl more comfortably on his couch.

"There's a reason I haven't played a show in Central for so long, Barry. You're a fan. Surely you remember the shooting, five years ago." Len said almost casually. Everything was quiet for a minute. A shooting. There was a shooting! Someone tried to kill winter storm at one of their concerts! They had less security back then, and Len was rushed to the hospital, the gunman somehow managed to escape, it was all over the news for weeks.

"You think the shooter will come back?" Barry asked quietly.

"I think someone here in Central wants me dead. And I'm foolish enough to tempt them. Tomorrow's show could turn out quite different than tonight's." Len explains.

"Oh my god! You ass!" Barry hisses.  
"You can't invite me to be your date, then put your life in danger!" He scolds.

"My life's usually in danger, Barry. Tomorrow just serves to draw them out. But don't worry. I have it on good authority that things have changed. Central City is protected now. And that I have to see for myself."

"Len. Oh my god Len are you talking about the Fl-about the blur?" Barry's almost back to squeaking. 

"As impossible as it sounds, Barry, yes. I may be baiting the gunman out, but I trust that I'll be protected, just as this city is protected." He explains calmly.

"Len you goddamn idiot, how do you even know it's real? It's just a blur!" Barry's up and pacing his apartment.

"Have you ever heard of a little anonymous blog detailing this blur?" He asks. Barry sighs heavily.

"You believe because of her blog?" He groans. 

"I have my reasons, for believing the way I do, Barry. But if you need more proof, I'd say that blog is a good place to start. Now, I'll see you before the show tomorrow, assuming you'd still like to see me?"

"Yeah, yes, Len. I still want to see you. You stupid self sacrificing-" Barry stopped to grunt through the frustration.  
"I'll be there, Len." Barry promises, both as Barry Allen, and the flash.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bleh. So I try to stay several chapters ahead of when I'm posting, and I'm having trouble with ch 14/15. I know where it's going, but maybe since I'm so excited to write the next thing after this ch(s), it's just hard to write. Idk. Maybe I'm just bad at writing fluff. Normally I'd finish at least the chapter I'm working on before posting another (Although since ive been posting so irregularly I don't feel so bad) but this time I just felt like posting this chapter might help me write the one I'm working on. There's logic there somewhere


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aha! It worked, ch 14 and 15, complete! Thank you. I knew there was some logic in there somewhere! This chapters shorter, but I still like it. :)

Barry couldn't sleep. Someone was very possibly planning Len's grizzly murder right now. Would they try to attack during the show again? Len definitely has increased security, but with Metahumans now, they might not stand a chance. Snart said someone in Central wants him dead. But maybe it isn't that. Maybe it's someone doesn't want him here specifically. Like a turf war. Only Len wasn't a criminal in this timeline. But he was still the same person up until he became famous, right? So he use to be a criminal. Maybe someone remembers. There wasn't time for this. Len didn't want Barry's help on this, he just wanted the flash. Typical Cold. Barry huffed. Of course Barry would save him when it came to it. Even if they weren't dating. The thought made Barry's heart flutter, and he groaned into his pillow. He was dating Captain Cold. Or at least had a date with him. At a fancy event. And press would probably be there. Oh my god pictures of them might end up in those trash magazines. Everyone would see them. But, Barry reminded himself, no one would judge him for it. That was going to take some getting use to. Hell, Barry's room at Joes house was probably still full of those posters.  
Joe! Barry got dressed and sped to Joe's. He sighed In relief when he saw Joe's car outside. He didn't think this through fully. Barry scratches the back of his neck as he knocked on Joe's door. After a minute, Joe answered the door with a look of confusion.

"Barry? What are you doing here?" Joe frowned.

"I, hey. Can we talk?" Barry didn't know if Joe knew about him being the flash, but if he was going to save Len tomorrow, he could really use police back up. 

"Sure, come on in." Joe replied, still confused. Barry closed the door behind him.

"So, I'm not really sure how to explain this," Barry started.

"Barr, what's wrong?" Joe frowned.

"Well... I... I think someone is going to come after Len Winters, probably tomorrow." Barry said almost too quickly.

"Len Winters?" Joe folded his arms, eyebrow raised.  
"Barr, I really don't like you doing this. I know you've wanted to meet him since you were a kid, but you can't just make up a threat-"

"What? Joe, last time he was in Central he was shot!" Barry protested.

"It happens, Barry, some of these famous people's fans are crazy. That doesn't mean lightning will strike twice." Joe grimaced at his poor analogy.  
"I'm sure he's fine." He tried again.

"But what if it wasn't a fan. All I'm asking is that you have a police car outside the arena just in case." Barry tried.

"Barry it's sweet you care so much about this guy, but he's just a guy. You know they say you shouldn't meet your heroes." 

"Joe, he's not-that's not my point." Barry sighs.

"I just don't want you to get your hopes up, guys like that aren't even going to see the people around them." Joe shrugs.

"Len isn't-I'm not here to defend him, I'm here asking for help." Barry huffed. Was Joe always this stubborn?! Wow. Dumb question.

"Having the extra security isn't going to impress him Barr, you want my advice, just do your job and get out."

"I don't need to impress him, we're already-" Barry cut the sentence short thankfully, taking a breath before trying again.  
"Len thinks someone is going to come after him at tomorrow's show. I believe him. Can you help?" He tried, as simply as he could. Joe watched him for a second.

"Barry is this man taking advantage of you?" Joe accuses, and Barry throws his arms up in frustration. 

"Forget it, Joe, I'll ask Eddie." Barry shakes his head as he turns to leave.

"Come on Barr, you know I'm just worried!" Joe called after him, but Barry just couldn't. He left in a huff, waiting until he was at the corner before speeding home. He fell into his couch, before picking up his phone and writing out the text.

"Hey Iris, I know this is going to sounds strange, but is there anyway you can convince Eddie to have a police car outside the concert tomorrow?" Barry texted. Iris sent a question mark in return, followed by 

"Should I be worried?"

"I think someone might try to attack Len like the last time they were in Central. I think your blur might appreciate a squad car for back up." Barry hovered over the send button, worried that it would be too much to mention the blur, but deciding to send it anyways.

"I'll do what I can, but you're going to have to explain IN DETAIL soon, ok?" She replied. Barry left out a breath. Thank god for Iris. After that, Barry was finally able to fall asleep.


	11. Chapter 11

There was a banging on the door again.

"Barry Allen, wake the fuck up! I will break this door down!" Barry snorted himself awake again, before stumbling to the door.

"Seriously? Again?" Barry asked with a yawn.

"This is why I show up an hour early." James huffed, shoving a coffee from Jitters towards Barry.

"I'm up, it's fine." Barry whined.

"Right sure, but you're meeting your hot rock star boyfriend, so I figured you could use the extra time to get ready." James shrugs, pushing his way past Barry. Barry grumbles, but doesn't complain any more than that. 

"Barry come on!" James groaned out.  
"We gotta go, come on I gave you so much time!" He whined from the other room. Barry flashes through three more outfits before finally coming out.

"Sorry, sorry, I'm ready." Barry smiles sheepishly. James just rolls his eyes before the two head out. Barry just makes sure to grab his backpack with his suit and a few power bars on the way.  
Barry was nervous the whole drive. Len seemed so sure tonight would be different. What did he mean he was going to draw them out? Barry's leg bounced nervously, and at a red light, James turned to him.

"Barry, breathe. The guy clearly likes you, so relax." He huffs.

"No, I know. Just nervous." Barry shrugs.

"I know. Don't be. You got this." And maybe Barry did. He was the flash, he could move fast enough to stop a bullet, if that was how they would make an attempt on Len's life. But Barry was considering that the best case scenario at this point. Worst case, it would be a meta. And with all those cameras, if it was a meta, the secret would be out, whether or not Barry stopped them in time to save Len. His leg began bouncing nervously again. James just sighed.   
When they arrived, Barry trudged behind James to the stage area. Set up wouldn't take as long today, since it was mostly just recalibrating, and rechecking it all, but time still dragged on for Barry. The second they were done, Barry was tripping over his own feet, breezing past security to Len's trailer. He hesitated, letting out a shakey breath before knocking.

"Barry." Len answered with a soft smile. Barry walked in past him, and began pacing the trailer.

"Why are you so calm? Are you seriously trying to get your attempted murderers out here? This is the stupidest thing you've ever done." Barry huffed. Len leaned into Barry's space, smirk firmly planted.

"And here I was hoping for a good luck kiss." He teases. Barry looks up at Len with a pout.

"Good luck kiss comes later, lecture time right now." Barry said firmly, but still found his hands moving across Len's chest, pulling him in close as Len closed the distance. Len kisses him softly, assuringly.

"I'm going to be fine Barry. Central City has changed since I was last here."

"I know. It's still stupid." Barry sighed, half muffled by Len's shoulder.

"Quite possibly." Len laughed softly.  
"But this is important." 

"I know. Can't have someone out there thinking they can intimidate you, huh?" Barry snuggles into the hold, wrapping his arms around Len a little tighter.

"Precisely" Len leaned down, kissing Barry again. He led them over to the bed, sitting down, and pulling Barry on his lap. Barry hummed into the kiss, suddenly thankful James got them here so early. Their kisses were soft, and unrushed. 

"Are you sure someone's coming tonight?" Barry asks quietly, resting his head on Len's shoulder.

"I'm sure they would have come last night if it hadn't been such short notice." Len replies, rubbing small circles in Barry's back.  
"Besides, I have some new music planned out, written just for tonight." Len almost laughs.

"Just, don't treat this like a game." Barry sighs.

"I won't hide anymore, Barry. It's time to deal with this little threat once and for all."

At some point, the two had to detangle, and Len had to lead Barry out.  
"I'll see you out there." Len promises with a kiss.

"I'm going to be really mad if you die." Barry huffed, but Len just laughed.

"Go enjoy the show, Barry. I know I will."


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Edit: well I forgot to put the song names lol. 
> 
> No place like home by Todrik Hall  
> Castle by Halsley

Barry met up with James in the audience, but was all nerves. He kept looking around, waiting for a threat to reveal itself. The opening band seemed to play forever, until finally, Len led his band onto center stage.

"Central City." Len started smugly, already pulling a massive wave of cheers.  
"Tonight, we have two, maybe three, brand new songs to play for you." He was smirking. That idiot was putting his life on the line, and he was fucking smirking. Barry almost considered just flashing him out of there now.  
Len waited for the roar of the crowd to die down, before nodding to his band to start up the music. It began as almost an eerie wizard of oz theme...

"Pay no attention,  
To the man behind the curtain.  
He's a brainless heartless coward  
With no power.  
That's just another trick of his he ain't no wizard  
Don't feed his fire  
Jump in my balloon, I'll take you higher  
Take you somewhere over the rainbow  
Get your ticket to the show  
Heels clicking here we go  
Cause you already know  
There's no place like home"

Barry's heart was pounding as he surveyed the crowd. 

"is where the heart is,  
Some brainiacs will tell you home is where your house and car is  
But if you're brave enough to love the ones you hate the hardest,  
You might find,  
Cause sometimes  
Home is where your deepest scar is  
Society will try to cast you where they think your part is  
Give awards and accolades to what they think a star is  
But go find your,  
Go find your home."

Nothing yet, just screaming fans. Barry chanced a look over at Len, who was singing with a wicked grin, sending a wink over Barry's way.

"Pay no attention  
To the lies they try to feed ya  
It's a wicked twisted fable  
He's not stable.  
It's just another box of tricks  
A crock of shit  
And good dreams go wasted;  
Hungry for the fame  
Don't let him taste it!" 

Wait a minute. Len's trying to draw him out; he's singing about the shooter! He already knows who it is.

"Imma tell the story my way  
Cause the only way home ain't on his yellow brick highway, there's no place like home!"

He couldn't mean... oh my god, it was Lewis?! Of course it was. Barry kept a watchful eye, waiting for Lewis, or his goons to show up.

"Pay no attention  
To the man who'll try to change ya  
He's a dark familiar stranger  
But that's the danger,  
The storm is strong  
But it won't be long  
Cause no matter where you roam;  
There's no place like home." Len looked a little intense. He might play it cool, but he was expecting Lewis to interrupt the song. Barry looked around again, but nothing was out of the ordinary yet.

"Alright, Central City." Len huffed into the mic.  
"Looks like we're going for three." He nodded to his band, who looked concerned, but not enough to say they knew the risk. They started up the next song, an eerie mechanical sound revving up. 

"Sick of all these people talking" Len almost seemed to glare around the audience, challenging.  
"Sick of all this noise.  
Tired of all these cameras flashing,  
Sick of being poised.  
Now my neck is open wide  
Begging for a fist around it" Len physically pulled his shirt collar down, causing fan girls to erupt.  
"Already choking on my pride  
So there's no use crying about it." Len paces the stage carefully as the music built, before turning his full performance up.  
"I'm headed straight for the castle.  
They're gonna make me their queen." He bit out the words like a threat, and Barry had to actively avoid noticing how much he looked like his old self; focus on the threat.  
"And there's an old man sitting on the throne that's saying that I probably shouldn't be so mean,  
I'm headed straight for the castle.  
They got the kingdom locked up.  
And there's an old man sitting on the throne that's saying I should probably keep my pretty mouth shut,  
Straight for the castle." There. Barry saw the man from across the arena, adjusting his ear piece, and clearly not enjoying the show. He was reaching for something; Barry ran, he had time to put the suit on, thank god, but there was no way the people around him didn't notice Barry disappearing, it didn't matter, he heard the screams, the gunshot. Barry caught the bullet-too close the Len-and grabbed the shooter. He phased them through the walls, and out in to the parking lot, relieved to find the squad car waiting for them. This part was easy. Take Eddie's handcuffs, handcuff the shooter, bag the gun in the evidence bag, get back to the show. Barry changed in the washroom, before finding his way back through the crowd.

"-entlemen, Central City's own Super Hero: The Flash!" Len announcement reverberated through the speakers, and Barry felt his heart drop.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so stuck on ch 18. I've been pretty busy, so I kept think like oh I'll just figure it out while I'm in line or some shit. But I'm still stuck. I know exactly where it's suppose to go, but what I wrote isn't going where I want it to? Idk it's like im trying to make it too complicated when it's just suppose to be a simple chapter. Idk. Over thinking it.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song is Hero by Ruelle. Ch 18 is finally done (or close?) I rewrote it like three times before going in a totally different direction, but I think it'll work in well :)

That absolute asshole! Barry pushes his way through the crowd as Len motioned for the band to start up their next song.

"This ones for you, flash." Len drawled out, his vicious smirk growing with the roaring crowd.

"This wind that blows  
Cuts through the bone" Barry couldn't believe him! Was this ever even about the shooter?!  
"The hunger grows,  
We're getting closer and closer.

And everyone's watching  
It all unfold  
Everyone's watching  
Who's gonna take the throne?  
Everyone's watching  
Who's gonna run the show." God Len was just fucking carefree up there! Barry made it back to his spot next to James, but the rest would have to wait. He was definitely going to give Snart an earful after the show.  
"Everybody wants a hero  
Everybody wants someone  
To lay it all down on the line.  
Everybody wants a hero  
Everybody wants someone  
Who's gonna fight fire with fire." Barry was so mad he couldn't even enjoy this. He huffed.  
"The ground it shakes,  
These iron chains  
It's made to break  
Who's gonna rise up and save us?" 

After the song ended, Len stood at the mic for a second, eyes scanning the crowd appreciatively.

"Central City." He hummed.  
"With such an exciting night, I'm afraid we're going to have to cut the rest of the show short." Len explains, and Barry's already heading towards the back.  
"It is so good to be back."

Barry was waiting as close to the stage as security would allow him. As soon as Len walked over, his band behind him, Barry through his hands up.

"What the hell was that?!" He nearly squeaks out. Len places an arm around Barry as they head to his trailer, ignoring the snort of amusement from his band.

"I told you I'd be fine." Len almost whispers as he lets them in. With the door closed behind them, Barry huffs.

"This was never about the shooter, was it. You just wanted the flash." Barry is so mad, but he can't make it sound anything but quiet and hurt.

"Barry. If there's one thing you should know about me, it's that I want it all." Snart told him seriously, before stepping away to pour himself a drink. Barry glared at him.

"I'm so mad at you right now." He almost pouted. Len chuckled sadly.

"See? I told you, I'm the one who should be worried."

"Yeah, but you're not. You're so... carefree, like you don't even care if you live or die, it's infuriating!" Barry huffed out. Snart turned to him, a considering look, for a moment.

"Did you believe in the flash before tonight?" He asks, judging Barry's reaction carefully. 

"I-that's not important."

"But it is. The way I see it, the flash is out there, squashing metas and stopping crime, doing the good work and protecting good people. But this city deserves more from him, it always has. Central City needs its hero, and its long past time he shows up for them." 

"I-I'm so mad at you right now I can't even think about this." Barry shakes his head turning to leave.  
"I'll call you later, or see you before tomorrow's show, or something." He huffs, before walking out the door. He wanders back through the arena, and out into the parking lot.

"Barry!" Iris runs over to him, throwing her arms around him.  
"I can't believe this! I got clean footage of 'The Flash'! Look at this!" Iris leans into Barry's space to show him the video on her phone. Barry almost groans. No definable features, of course, but it was clearly a person, not just a blur.  
"You have to tell me everything! How did you know!?" She asked, grinning wildly. And Barry wants to tell her everything. He looks around for a minute before sighing.

"Can we go? I'll text James that I'm riding with you, and I'll explain everything." He wasn't sure how much of everything he even could explain, but him being the flash was a good place to start.  
The ride was quiet, at first. Iris seemed more on edge, reading Barry's nerves easily.

"So. About the blur." Barry started with a sigh.

"The Flash." Iris corrects.

"Yeah. About that." Barry watches the scenery flying by, suddenly wondering if it's safe to tell Iris this while she's driving.

"Yes?" She asks.

"So I am the flash." Barry said simply. Iris just made a face.

"Shut up. What's really going on?"

"Iris, honestly. After getting struck by lightning I woke up from that coma with unbelievable speed. I've been working with star labs to help as many people as we can. I'm sorry I never told you, I don't know why I didn't." He sighed, thumping his head back.

"You're serious." Iris replied quietly.  
"I've been writing about this blur for years? And this whole time," she cut her sentence short with a huff.  
"Did my dad tell you to keep this from me?" She demands.

"No! Not here, anyways, I don't even think he knows." Barry hurriedly replies. Iris was quiet for a moment.

"Barry this is a lot to throw at me." She says softly.

"There's so much more, Iris, and I want to tell you everything. I know it's a lot to take in, but I need-I need my best friend right now." 

"Ok. Ok, we'll go back to my place, and we'll talk this through." She nods. Barry lets out a sigh of relief. Where would he even start? Would he tell her he wasn't the real Barry? That he was from a timeline that didn't exist anymore? Time travel was a big thing to start with, let alone that. If he was going to explain that, maybe he should start with-oh god Eobard. Last time Eobard bugged every one of their houses! Was it even safe talking about this? This was a bad idea.

"This is a bad idea." Barry echoed his own thoughts.  
"I do want to tell you everything, but, there's too much right now, I-I can't yet." Barry was almost in tears as he phased himself out of Iris' car and just ran.   
He needed someone; something, he needed to end this, to get rid of Eobard, and end things with Snart, and tell his family the truth, and he-he wanted to go home. But his timeline was gone. He shattered it. There was no going home.


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oof. Well, might as well update with what I have written, lol

After running the city for over an hour, Barry finally phased back into his apartment, and plopped down on his couch. He slowly pulled his phone out of his pocket, groaning at all the missed calls and texts.   
Two missed calls from Iris, and a text saying she'd be there when he was ready to talk.  
One text from James, saying how crazy the concert was, and hoping Len was ok.  
Six missed calls from Cisco, two from Star Labs, three from Caitlin... Barry sighed, before calling Cisco.

"Dude Dr Wells is livid." Cisco almost laughed. Barry huffed out a mix of emotions.  
"Don't get me wrong, I'm really glad you saved the band, and this video is top notch; you can almost see the chest emblem. It looks really cool man, but Dr Wells is pretty mad."

"Let him be. I did what I had to do." Barry grumbled.

"You know nothing's going to be the same, right?" Cisco asked after a minute.  
"Everyone knows you're out there now."

"I know." He remembered this feeling well enough, the last time Snart baited him onto national television. After hanging up, Barry ended up sulking for a few more hours before finally falling into a restless sleep. 

Barry groaned loudly at the banging at his door. Barry pulled out his phone. Two o'clock.

"Hang on James!" Barry huffed, stumbling to the door. He opened it, and James handed him a coffee.

"Are these bribes?" Barry asked, watching the coffee carefully. James rolled his eyes.

"Obviously. Now tell me what happened yesterday. I'd think after a near death experience, you and Len Winters would be banging for sure."

"I'm just," Barry huffed, shuffling past James and to his bedroom.  
"I'm just a little mad at him right now, that's all." He explained quietly, before hiding behind his door. 

"You don't get to be mad at him! He's a rock star, Barry! And the poor guy almost got murdered! And you didn't even talk to him? That's cold, bro."

"I don't want to talk about it, bro!" Barry yelled back through the door.

"But bro, you getting it on with a rock star is the most interesting things that's ever happened to me." 

"Can we stop with all the bros?" Barry asked, once he was ready and out the door. The walk to the car was quiet, and the ride wasn't looking much better.

"You know I can set up on my own today if you want to kiss and make up with him." James offers half way through the drive.

"It's fine. I'll go see him after we set up." Barry shrugs.

They set up in silence, and Barry took his time walking to Len's trailer. He sighed before knocking. 

"It's open." Len called. Barry hesitantly opened the door and let himself in. Len was sitting against the headboard of his bed, legs stretched out, and a book in his hand.

"So I'm still mad, but I think maybe I over reacted." Barry explained. 

"Don't do that." Len said disinterestedly, before turning his eyes back to his book.

"Don't do what?" Barry sighed.

"Let other people get in your head about how you should feel. If you're mad at me, let me have it." He explained calmly, not glancing up at Barry again.

"I am mad." He huffed.

"Then talk to me about it." For such a caring sentiment, Snart sure found a way to make it sound like a demand. Barry crosses his arms.

"You knowingly put yourself in harms way just to expose the flash." Barry bit out.

"I was already in harm's way. And the flash should be flattered that I wrote a song for him." Len was still just reading casually, and it was starting to get on Barry's nerves.

"That's-" wait, Len wrote a song for him? Barry really needed to go back and watch last night's show.  
"That's not the point." He pouted.

"Then what is?" 

"I-I don't know." Barry replied after a second.

"Do want to be mad, or do you want to come here?" Len asked, finally setting down his book and looking at Barry. Barry hesitated.

"Can't I do both?" He asks. 

"Sure, Barry." Len chuckled. Barry crosses the trailer, nearly crawling into the bed next to Len, and leaning his head on Len's shoulder.

"What're you reading?" Barry asked softly.

"Jaws, 1974." 

"You like shark week." Barry said more than asked. Len hummed in response.

"What about you, Barry? What do you like?" Len's voice reverberated softly, and Barry couldn't help but sigh contently, letting the tension from this whole week ease.

"I like... musicals. And sci-fi. I like..." Barry trailed off, daring to run his fingers over Len's chest, scooting a little closer.  
"..movie marathons that border on the insane, and documentaries about aliens and big foot." Len laughs at him a little, but he stretches his arm around Barry a little more.

"So what I'm hearing, is that we're going to have a musical marathon soon." Len teases, but it still makes Barry's heart flutter.

"You don't have a tv in here." Barry almost whispers with a smile.

"I can buy one. Or we can go to yours." Len shrugs. 

"Without your body guards? I don't think so." Barry snuggles in closer.  
"And I'm still mad."

"I can tell." Len chuckles, kissing the top of Barry's head.   
The two talked in lazy tones until a knock on the door startled them.

"On in ten!" The voice yelled through the door. 

"I should probably get ready." Len nearly whispered. Barry sat up, looking at Len fondly.

"Can I come back after the show?" Barry asks, biting his lip lightly.

"Of course." Len leans up, and Barry meets the kiss.

"I'll see you out there." Barry promises, pulling back after a few soft kisses.


	15. Chapter 15

Barry made his way out through the crowd as the opening band finished off their set. James gave him an enthusiastic thumbs up, and Barry rolled his eyes with a soft smile. Barry cheered with the crowd when Winter Storm came on stage, and watched Len preform with awe and pride. Barry let down all the defenses, and the stress of everything that came with his life, and just enjoyed the concert. He sang along with songs he never heard before, and felt that deep connection with them. When the show came to an end, and Len was up there, thanking the crowd, Barry couldn't wait to get back by his side. His heart was pounding, and he couldn't stop smiling, wide and genuine. Len smiled fondly down at him, and Barry was beaming. 

Barry knocked on Len's trailer.

"Barry. Enjoy the show?" Len asks, letting Barry in. Barry laughs, immediately pulling Len in for a kiss. It was sweeter and slower than before; a kiss filled with soft smiles.

"I don't want to be mad anymore." Barry said quietly.

"What do you want?" Len challenges softly, and Barry doesn't know how to answer.

"I just want to be with you." He says honestly. Snart pulls him in close, kissing the top of his head softly.

"I don't have a tv, but we could watch something on my laptop." Len offers, still holding Barry close. Barry laughs fondly.

"What do you want to watch?" Barry asks, pulling away enough to lead Len towards the bed.

"How about one of your musicals?" Len asks, pulling his laptop out and joining Barry on the bed.

"Works for me." Barry cuddles close to Len as he sets up the movie.

"Barry," Len nudged Barry, trying to wake him up gently as the credits rolled.  
"Barry, your phone's ringing." Len said softly, still nudging. Barry groaned, before slowly sitting up and looking at Snart. For a second, Barry was almost in shock.

"Len." Barry said, still groggy.

"Barry." Len smirked back.  
"Your phones ringing." Len repeated, glancing down at Barry's pocket. Barry jumped up to answer.

"James! Oh my god I am so sorry, what time is it?!" Barry glanced back at Len, wildly and apologetic. Len quirked a brow.  
"No, no, I'll be right out. Ok, bye." Barry hung up the phone with a sigh.  
"So James is my ride, and he's tired of waiting for me? I gotta go." Barry leaned across the bed to kiss Len quickly.  
"I'll see you tomorrow?"

"I look forward to it. And Barry. If you ever need a ride, I can easily arrange that for you. No need to keep your friend waiting." Len offered. Barry froze a little, before smiling warmly.

"I might take you up on that." 

"Three. Hours." James groaned.

"I am so sorry." Barry sighed, as the two made their way to James' car.

"No, no, it's fine. I'm just sorry that I didn't interrupt something more interesting. Shame to have woke you." James teased.

"Hey, were not in any rush, ok? We'll get there." Barry pouted. James just laughed.

"It's your life." James dropped Barry off, with the increasingly unbelievable promise to show up at three.

"It's fine James, I'll see you at two." Barry laughed.   
Barry settles on his couch, pulling up the concert footage from last night. He watched an rewatched the moment he saved Len, too close. Finally he sped forward and watched the song Len wrote for him. Well not, him, but the flash. About him being a hero. Barry pauses the video. Looking at the still image of Len on stage, in his element, for a while. What could he even see in Barry? He sighed, shutting down his computer before getting ready for bed.

Barry was up and ready by the time James showed up, just shy of two o'clock.

"Damn look at you. Did you actually wake up before noon?" James asked, handing Barry a coffee before leading the way out.

"Well. Almost." Barry grinned. 

"Just remember we gotta stick around to dismantle the set, so don't go running to sleep with your man right after." James teases.

"I know. And Len said he could get me a ride home, so you don't need to wait up for me." Barry smiled.

"Oof, about time!"

"Shut up."  
The two got their usual drive through food on the way, and set up the stage in a companionable silence. James gave Barry a quick 'good luck', and Barry was headed to Len's trailer.

"You're early." Len said, an all too amused smile across his face.

"Setting up went quick today." Barry shrugged, following Len in.  
"What is that smell?" Barry nearly moaned.

"It's just pizza, Barry." Len laughed.  
"Help yourself."

"If this is a bribe, it's working." Barry teased, moving around Len to bee-line for the pizza.

"Mh, but now I know your secret." Len teased right back. Barry almost choked.  
"The way to your heart." Len continued in a purr. Barry laughed almost nervously.  
"Someday maybe I could cook for you." Len almost promises, leaning against the counter.

"You cook? Don't you have people for that?" Barry laughed, setting down his pizza to lean opposite Len.

"Careful, Barry. You wouldn't want to miss out on one of my homemade meals."

"No, I wouldn't." Barry grinned, crossing the space between them to give Len a light kiss.

Len watched with amusement as Barry went right back to his pizza.

"I've been meaning to ask you," Len started, sitting across from Barry. Barry looked up at him from behind his pizza.  
"But I've been worried about sounding, self centered, I suppose." Len pauses, waiting for Barry to make a series of hand motions as he chews.

"I'd like to think we're past the point of pretending you're the self serving loner that you pretend to be." Barry almost huffed out.  
"Seriously, you can just ask." Barry shrugged, taking another bite of his pizza.

"Do you have a favorite song of mine?" There was that calculating, careful, expression again.

"Well. I don't think you'll like the answer." Barry shrugged, almost sadly.

"Now how could you know that?"

"Because it's from your third album. I mean, I like your third album the best over all. But I wouldn't want you to write another like it. I like it because it's sad and horrible; and more than that, I like it because nothing since has ever been so sad. I always liked to think writing those songs helped you heal from it." Barry couldn't look at Len as he explained this. He remembered a lot about it, though. He remembered the album came out three days before the anniversary of his mother's death. That the album was so gut wrenching, it matched his own pain, surpassed it, and left Barry feeling a lot less alone. He remembered noticing that Winter Storm never played songs from the third album, barely talked about it. Every song detailed trauma and misery and grief, and so much more that Barry had never known in the old timeline. And now those traumas were sang, recorded, and put out to the whole world. It was at this point that Barry had to look up at Len. It had been quiet for too long. Len looked conflicted, but the sadness, and maybe shame, were clear in his eyes.

"I shouldn't have asked." Len finally says softly.

"It didn't help you heal, did it?" Barry almost asks. Len sighs.

"Barry..." Len leans his head back, crossing his arms a little tighter.  
"I'd like to tell you everything. But this," Len trailed off, finally looking back at Barry.  
"At some point, my band will be back on the road." Len frowns, and Barry feels his heart drop.

"Oh. Yeah, of course." Barry says quietly.

"I want this, Barry. And I have plenty of business here in town to keep me for a while." Len explains,  
"But at some point the novelty of being with me will wear thin. There are some things that could damage me far past that." 

"Wait. Are you saying that I'm going to be the one to leave you? Because you realize that's insane, right?" Barry actually can't believe what he's hearing.

"I know it feels that way right now, but given time-"

"No, no, hang on. You're serious. Len I'm not going anywhere. I mean I can't travel the world with you when you're on tour, and I don't know how you feel about long-distant things, but this is really good. We're really good." Barry finishes softly. Len somehow looks more hesitant than when Barry started.  
"You don't have to tell me anything now. We've got time, right?" Barry stepped closer to Len, but waited for Len to close the distance. Len huffed our a smile before nodding, and pulling Barry into his arms.

"Sure, kid, all the time in the world."


End file.
